Our small miracle

You often hear people say, "God is good" or "Praise God" when something goes well or when life is good. Sure....
But the reality is that God is ALWAYS good and we should always praise him. No matter what. Period. There is no condition to his goodness and it's one of those things that gets on my nerves. God is good in all situations, even the tough ones. Even more so in the bad ones, I think, because we have to rely on his goodness and grace to see us through those situations. This is Mateo in his isolette @ the NICU (4 lbs 4 oz. born at 32 weeks and 1 day gestation)

Tomorrow is when Mateo should've turned 18 months...the big 1 1/2. Instead, he is almost 20 months old and a happy, thriving toddler.

From 4 to 24 pounds, we are daily thankful for the little boy that he has become. In the pictures below, he is holding a teddy bear that is wearing one of his preemie outfits....
You don't always know why things happen as they do, or for what purpose, but this much is true: that God uses all things...

^"2 Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, ³ because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. " James 1:2-3

It is really hard for me to look at NICU pictures of Mateo. But I do it anyways b/c even though it is sad for me to see my baby like that, it also makes me overflow with thankfulness for how far he has come. He was not the "angel" baby that some brag about, nor is he the most independent of toddlers, but we love him. Just like he is. Just how God created him.

He is growing up more every day and I can now honestly say that I enjoy being with him all day (even though 5:30pm often doesn't come soon enough ;) He loves to help me with everything from putting things in the trash or recycling, folding diapers, sweeping the kitchen, organizing toys, etc. He no longer cries for 12 hours a day, he falls asleep on his own, sleeps through the night, has 16 teeth and a new haircut, laughs a lot, loves to watch animals in the back yard, could eat his weight in bread and raisins, does all my couponing with me, is in love with his daddy, and loves to give kisses on the cheek.

Mateo = gift from God.
This we know to be true.

Learning from the kids

So I teach the kids at church. This week I talked Aaron into helping as a "sub" to fill in for some people that couldn't make it. He declared that he wanted the harder group. Really? Sweet! So I gave him the little rowdy boys. "What are you going to do when they start rolling around on the floor?" was my first question for him. I don't think he had an answer.

Anyways, I got to work with the older kids- which is my favorite. And it ended up being an all girls group b/c I did a little rearranging. Very chatty girls, but I soon realized what a heart they had for their friends and family. I was going to pray before we got started with small group stuff- and they all started spouting off these prayer requests for people that they obviously cared deeply for. Simple things to serious things alike. I assured them that God is never too busy to listen to our prayers. We never bother him when we pray. He loves us to pray to him. (This coming right after we read Mark 10:13-16 when the disciples yelled at people for bothering Jesus with their kids.) So we prayed for their friends and their family and I vowed to bring them prayer journals next week so they could use them at home.

When I got home that day, I was wondering who the teacher was that morning. Me...or them?

p.s. Yes, Aaron survived. But with the declaration that, "I'm SO not a teacher" or something of the sorts. I think he did great.

Spend less to work less....

So dinner is in the crockpot, laundry is in the washer, and my tot is napping...so that means I get a few minutes to sit down at the computer! Yipee!!

My heart continues to ache for people that want to stay home with their babies but don't think they can. Like I've said before, there are plenty of people who don't have that desire. But for those that do- and who aren't the only bread winner of the family- this is what I have to say:
YOU CAN STAY HOME WITH YOUR BABY IF YOU WANT IT BADLY ENOUGH!

Pray pray pray!!

But I'm NOT the type of person who would tell you to pray for a lump of money to fall from the sky so you could continue your current lifestyle. No, I'm the kind of person that would tell you to pray to God and ask for his wisdom on how to manage your money differently. All knowledge and wisdom come from our great God and He is ultimately the one who will give you the discernment and self discipline to make the cuts you'll need to. Yes, lots of self disciple needed.

Now maybe your husband (or wife... plenty of SAHDs now ;) is a brain surgeon and you quitting your job isn't the biggest deal. But for most of us- our spouse probably has a regular job.

I decided to check out a couponing book from the library and the author, Stephanie Nelson, wrote this on the first page (that's as far as I've gotten, hehe):

"In 1995, my husband and I made the decision to downsize our lifestyle so that I could stay home with our boys, a two year old and a new baby. My quitting the corporate world meant our income would be cut in half, so I knew I was actually taking on two new roles: stay-at-home mom and CEO of our family budget...."

Boy could I relate! Since Aaron and I had very similar incomes, me quitting my job would literally mean cutting our income in half. Fortunately for us, we had been planning on this for a while- so it wasn't quite as harsh a transition as it could have been.

So what I'm saying in all of this- is....how bad do you want to be at home with your kids and what are you willing to give up? Are you willing to live in an apartment instead of a house? Are you willing to go to Goodwill?
For some reason the idea of being a professional budget advisor person appeals to me, but I don't think I'd land a job in that area b/c I would be a little tough on people. If they were buried in money problems, I'd probably tell them to sell their house b/c living in their current house would not allow them to leave within their means. I'd probably advise them to stop buying coffee at Starbucks (b/c I believe the little things do add up). Maybe I'd tell them to consider buying used clothing, mow their own lawns, buy a bag of potatoes instead of buying boxed potatoes, etc.

Take heart! There are books galore and websites galore on ways to manage your money. God is big. Read the book of Proverbs. We are to be discerning and prudent in how we utilize our resources....realizing that all of our money and resources are from God anyways. Though 2% of me misses having a "career", the other 98% of me is so glad to be at home managing the household and taking care of my boys (the big one and the little one ;)

Here are some things I've written about in past blogs to sum up. It really all comes down to spend less...in order to work less!

1. Try coupons to save money with toiletries, food, and entertainment.
2. Shop second hand.
3. Don't keep up with the Jones'.
4. Lower your standard of living.
5. Do more things yourself instead of paying others (food prep, yard work, etc.)
6. Make a budget with your spouse and stick to it.
7. Pay off debt and stay out of debt....only spend money that you have!


You can do it!

Presents?

Do you wonder how much the stuff below cost me on Thanksgiving? Let's see how many of you watched The Price Is Right...

So Black Friday is traditionally (in our country) where people go out and spend lots of money on Christmas presents. I love a good deal like anybody, but I've been increasingly turned off of the commercialism of Christmas the last couple of years...convicted to be less of a consumerist. I don't envision that would be how Jesus would want us to celebrate his birth. Gift giving is fun, but that's not really what it's about. I know when I would see people after Christmas, the common question I would be asked is, "What did you get for Christmas?". Isn't that bizarre? We are so indoctrinated with how our country "celebrates" that we are so focused on presents. This is an awesome site (and movement) http://www.adventconspiracy.org/
Check it out! What if we all spent less and gave more?

Now that we are parents, we have the opportunity to create new traditions, new celebrations, and it's kind of exciting. Mateo doesn't know who Santa Claus is, or how many presents he's supposed to get. He's innocent and it's amazing to see the joy he has in something so simple- like stabbing a piece of food with his fork successfully. If only we could retain our childhood authenticity into adulthood.

Oh, and I paid $3.75 for all the goodies in the picture. That's less than the price of one Noxema!
That was just at Walgreens. I was so excited getting home from Rite Aid that I put all the stuff away in my stockpiles before I remembered to take a picture.

I'll leave you with Advent Conspiracy's words....

Worship Fully
Spend Less
Give More
Love All

Great, great, life motto!

Keeping up with the Jones'

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Money Saving #5:
Don't try to keep up with the Jones' and lower your standard of living (if necessary). Biggest way to get and stay out of money problems and debt is to live within your means. In many cases this means lowering your standard of living. Why should you have the best of the best like Mr. Jones down the street? Especially if you can't afford it. Reality is, Mr. Jones likely went into debt to get that "thing" anyways. And if he didn't, good for him and you need to get over it.

Okay, sounds harsh. But seriously, if we "needed" everything our friends have and everything we see on TV, and everything in the magazines..... then that is gonna get us in trouble. The lust for stuff affects everybody. "If only I had ____ then I would be happy." This is what we often say to ourselves, but it is a lie. Things cannot fulfill us. Only God can do that. And I'm pretty sure he could care less if our clothes were from Nordstrom or the Salvation Army. For me, I like organizing projects. For my hubby, he likes video games. For Mateo.... well he doesn't care about stuff yet. He'll play with an empty spool of ribbon and a big cardboard box. Oh, the innocence of a child. Unfortunately, he'll be corrupted by our culture eventually...but we will pray and try hard to teach him wise money management and to be generous.

Basically, be content with what you have. And no, I didn't make that up. It's one of my favorite verses in the bible. All good wisdom comes from the bible...God's word. Something I need to work on still.

⁵ Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said,

“Never will I leave you;
never will I forsake you.”
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A time for laughter

I've been thinking a lot lately about how these last couple months have been filled with a lot of restoration for my little family. I think of Ecclesiastes chapter 3 when it talks about how there is a time for everything.... verse 4 especially stood out to me:

¹ There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under the heavens:

⁴ a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,

We are definitely laughing and dancing, now. Our first year of parenting was not very fun and we both agree that we made it through only b/c of God's grace. While many parents were raving about how fun having a little baby was and how they were savoring that stage.... we were all too excited for it to pass. Different people have different experiences. For some reason, that only God knows, things happened as they happened and even though every trial is supposed to make us joyful, we certainly didn't feel that way. Sleep deprived, energy deprived, family and support deprived, etc. etc. We were drained.
But now we are thankful for this (hopefully longer) season of rest. This is a unique season when Mateo sleeps from 7pm-7am. When we have our evenings together. When I can be home full time taking care of my boys and the house and the errands, etc. When for the first time since I can remember I am not busy busy like a chicken with my head cut off. No more degrees to get. No more homework. Been there, done that! No more sitting behind a desk. No lesson planning, grading, meetings, etc. Granted, I am still working on trying to be a little less busy. I still tend to get myself over committed...but at least this time it's by choice and not b/c of a demanding job at a title 1 school.

For the first time since high school, I did a sewing project. I made curtains for the living room, Mateo's room, the office, and valances for the kitchen. We are finally finishing the unpacking in our house. I'm doing some post-pregnancy and baby-stage nesting if there is such a thing.
I'm able to be involved in ministry for the first time in a while. Teaching the kids at church has been a fun season of time.

I'm also trying to take care of myself. Chronic problems like my back and throat pain are getting addressed. Physical therapy...so nice. Finding out I'm allergic to a lot of things- like milk and sugar cane....not so nice, but still good to know ;)

Now I better not blink b/c this time might be over. But for now, with my wonderfully awesome husband, my (almost) 17 month old son, and our great God teaching us and leading us.... we are going to be thankful and enjoy these days. Life is not easy, but it's been an awesome change.

1 Peter 5:10 (English Standard Version)

¹⁰And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you.

Value Villiage

Saving Money #4.....shopping second hand.
OK, so yesterday there was a 50% off sale at Value Village. Since Aaron had the day off, he took care of Mateo and I snuck out early to do some shopping. Now in my opinion, Value Village is pretty spendy for second hand clothes, but with the 50% sale, there are good deals for sure. Here is what I scored for me and Mateo:


For Mateo: two onesies, four long-sleeved shirts, footie PJs, and a pair of shoes!



For me: three pairs of jeans, a pair of jean shorts, a jean skirt, exercise pants, and three shirts.

How much did I spend?
$42.50

YES! It's true. For the price of a pair of jeans at the mall, I got a ton of stuff for us. Hooray. I needed more jeans and I find second hand shopping a great way for me to stretch our dollar.

I have liked buying second hand clothes ever since college when I started buying my own clothes. Back then I made, what $6.50 an hour or something like that?? When you start to think of how many hours you'd have to work to buy a clothing item, it definitely makes you think differently!

Now I haven't always been this way. When I was a kid I HATED going into the Goodwill. I thought it "smelled funny". My sister was the one who wanted all the fancy brands of clothing that we couldn't afford (remember Guess Jeans?!). So we'd go find them at the second hand stores. But I was a pain. Not any more. Ya, second hand stores might smell a little funny, but you can find great clothes that (at least for people the size of me and Mateo) were most likely given away b/c the person outgrew it...not b/c something was the matter with it. I guess that's one good thing about being puny.

I'll admit it does take some humbling, but for me I've never really had to desire to have certain brands of clothing or to have the nicest stuff. Something that feels comfortable is good. Especially now that I'm not working, I spend most of my day playing on the floor with Mateo and crawling around in his fort with him, haha.

Lastly, I know that shopping second hand for me is only half out of necessity. Even when I got my first teaching job, I still preferred to buy second hand. When Aaron and I were both working full time, I preferred second hand. I just don't' like spending lots of money on clothes. I preferred using money for other things like paying off my car, saving for a house, or say going to HAWAII!!.

One big thing that solidified this for me was my first mission trip to Mexico and seeing the great poverty that they lived in where we were serving. You can't come back from that and not be changed. I'll will have to write a post about that a different time.